Dear Madam President; Sincerely, Most Rev. Juan De Dios Pueblos, D.D.

Dear everyone, what do you want for your birthday? 
This letter is quite a nervy letter, well coming from a bishop.


5 February 2009

HER EXCELLENCY GLORIA MACAPAGAL-ARROYO
President, Republic of the Philippines
Malacañang Palace
Manila

Dear Madam President,

I will be celebrating my 66th birthday on March 8, 2009. 
(and you should know that Madam President, tell your secretary to mark that date on your calendar.)


I know this will be a precious day and timely occasion to thank the Lord for giving me another year.
(precious day it is, for on that day I expect equally precious gifts)


After a prayerful discernment and due considerations to the existing crisis phenomenon today, I have decided not to hold a birthday party.
(great, kunwari he's being one with the country's economic situation, with austerity in his mind)


Instead, I prefer to make use of my birthday as a day with and for myself, and with God.
(and probably with the tons of gifts that I will receive)


Having been declared, awarded and honored from your good office as ‘Peace Champion of Caraga…’
(kelangan talaga i-remind para maalala ni GMA na nagbigay pala siya ng award na ganun)



I am grateful to God that He has made me an instrument of His peace, especially here in Mindanao.
(I am really God-sent, please see me as an asset for Mindanao. I have an indirect but very important role in your government.)


I know I can do more to promote and work for peace.
(father, are you applying for a cabinet position?)


It is in this view that I am asking a favor from your Excellency.
(ETO NA!!!!!! Are you ready??)


At present, I really need a brand-new car, possibly a 4 x 4, which I can use to reach the far-flung areas of Caraga.
(Take note! A brand new car! specifically a 4x4! Ayaw talaga ni father humingi ng regalo ha. Brand new Montero ok? I wont settle for less. Look at the brighter side, pasalamat ka nalang I didnt ask for a Ferrari)


I hope you will never fail to give a brand new car which would serve as your birthday gift to me.
(I know you will not fail to give me the car because you need all the support you can get from the church)


For your information, I have with me a 7-year-old car which is not anymore in good running condition.
(Therefore I need a brand new car!  Nakakahiya naman, bishop ako tapos luma na ang sasakyan no. I do not look respectable anymore)


Therefore, this needs to be replaced very soon.
(Demanding si father! The nerve!!!!!)


I am anticipating your favorable response on this regard.
(or else)


Thank you very much.
(Thank you na agad kahit wala pa 'yung regalo.)



Be assured of my constant support and sincerest prayers for your Excellency.
(and I will keep my mouth shut about all the inconsistencies I know about your government, and all the other forms of bribery that you offer to bishops and priests every now and then)

God bless you.
(God bless you, specially when everyone finds out about this and about all the corrupt practices during your term)



Sincerely,
(Huh! Sincerely ha. In other words, seryoso ako, I need that car)


Most Rev. Juan De Dios Pueblos, D.D.
Bishop of Butuan 
P.O. Box 54, 8600 Butuan City